Friday, September 26, 2008
Saturday, June 7, 2008
It is better to love and lose it than never been loved at all and it is even better to love and lose it and find love again. Relationship failure usually leaves us with a shrapnel wound in most cases but yes there are rare cases of fatal one's, but I am talking mortals and select few can always be explained as exception.
In retrospect all mistakes can be corrected or fate can be made a willing accomplice but it is in flashing moment of truth that lines of reason get blurred and moments of madness destroy what is sacred. Every relationship that did not culminate in a way which is widely accepted as success leaves a galaxy of wisdom and it is these pieces of matter that form the building blocks of future universe. There painful memories remind us also of good times that preceded them and also it brings with it the realisation there are moments in life when we gave precedence to some one else other than ourselves and how it felt. It is this very realisation that makes us love once again and in spite of the embedded pieces of metal the soldier moves on to next battle and well and truly believes this will be a victorious one.
But never forget that the shards also make you leave a piece of you behind and always and always keeps a "what if ?" moment somewhere , sometime in some future in some unexpected bend.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
I am not a great believer in philosophies of Narendra Modi but his religious personal belief have not come in way of his prime focus, development of the state. Even the intellectually stunted left has shown tremendous foresight in West Bengal, Haryana and Punjab have managed to grow even under the most corrupt political system possible, for god’ s sake Bihar and Orissa are showing signs of growth and what is Tamilnadu doing trying to dig up a piece of Sea which no one is going to use.
I could write a treatise proving that Lord Ram existed in some form or other but that is not the issue we have. The broader problem is the abyss in which Tamilnadu is in right now , where a bunch of wimps who are religious beyond compare allow their leader to pass uncharitable comment on their belief and fete him for it.The solution lies in the Tamilian actually growing a spine and stop believing that the bunch of hair below his nose makes him a man.
Friday, August 24, 2007
The comments section of any movie review on Rediff is one of the best place to see this phenomenon , but you would find these creatures in other places too, like passion of cinema or Indiatimes . This is the so called elevated intellectual and SRK bashing brigade. I just noticed that irrespective of the movie being reviewed there would be at least a couple of comments on how SRK is a bad actor and how his movies suck. I presume this the bunch that writes the comment on the web and then heads straight to the adlabs website to book a ticket for next SRK movie , the collections of his movies do not seem to reflect the anguish of an average dimwit blogger on the rediff. Even super dud like Don seems to have grossed enough to send the producers laughing all the way to the bank. A commercial disaster like Paheli finds its way to Oscar nomination and past achievements need not be discussed here at all. I am sure a movie and the stars in it are not merely some people playing parts for which they are paid. We in India pride ourselves on ability to associate with the protagonist on what we want to do ourselves but are unable to even muster courage to think about it. It is for that reason alone I like SRK better than any other hero in Indian cinema, he presents a whole rounded role model. Irrespective how much my web friends want to argue SRK is yet to see the other side of law for either shooting a grazing buck or razing the city muck or innocently holding weapons for people who destroyed a city and all in good faith.Neither has after all the years of struggle together short changed the spouse for a newer younger model after the previous one had lost its sheen. He hasn't gone around letting his wife open fashion boutique forcing all his friends to make special appearances and for sake of damned paparazzi buy something or even worse make her an interior decorator messing up houses of whos who of nobodyland. He has more friends than foes in the Industry , he has not forgotten any of his old friends and it is visible in all the damned news you get around. He has put all he has earned back into the trade he earned it from. He has put his money where his mouth is , what more do you need from him.
I believe constructive criticism is good , but one sided rants by stunted rats on the rediff are simply unbearable.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Yes sir I do remember quite a few cries,
some mine some friends and few of the foes,
but nothing moves the thought of me as this does,
cause all it takes to scare me now is whimper just as it goes,
In my time I stood a lot of foes with might,
Some of it I won in some I put up a good fight,
but I do not sleep a wink fearing now all night,
cause there is finally a battle I do not care if I am right,
I have shared and shot a lot of great thinkers and put them in bind,
some of them were bright and some just were part of great grind,
but I am stumped for the word and all that I that have in mind,
cause what would I not do to decipher all of which is garbled wind,
I had thought I had my wants and dislikes all figured,
Some of it born with me some I acquired,
but now with a smile I do every possible act I despised,
cause what I do is not what I would give away even if the world was offered,
Yes sir I have a daughter and that is all I am for here.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Opening the door to hollow of my life , I could smell the fungal humidity in abandon. The abode (haunting) has all the necessary modern amenities that money could buy (proverbial) and as expected from the build up I have given, lacked all that money cannot buy (again proverbial). I have somehow got so used to the darkness around and within me , that I find it difficult to justify the money I pay to the local energy company. With the material belonging in the abode following absolute anarchy , it is an art dodging all these monstrous protrusions and traveling from one point to another. Since the darkness engulfs all and I see no hope of restoring the order among the material things, I have converted the art into a form of near exact science. With precision I moved towards my sanctum sanatoria and opened yet another hollow, this time in the wall to change into something that goes with the darkness. After changing into a pair of cloths I can’t figure out what color they were or what color they are now, I sat down to muse over my follies.
Follies are a very strange set of incidents , a perfectly genuine and justifiable action at point of decision making turns into a folly in hindsight. Logic states , we arrived at a justifiable decision by eliminating what would have been follies , then if we conclude at a later stage in life that , a particular action was a folly , then by corollary one of the options which we eliminated was the right decision. Going even further if we state that , probably the right decision was not even thought about at the time of action, then by logic the decision made was best available at the point of action , then again it cannot be a folly. Hence there is not decision or course of action in life , which can be a mistake or folly. It can be only that the , decision based on the available variables was wrong on back of an unknown variable hence it is an act of fate , about which you can’t do a thing.
A whole paragraph wasted on justifying the process of wrong decision making with support of logic is the gift that has made me professionally so sound, alas if I could convince or at best lie to myself. But may be I am right this time , there is no right decision ever , all decisions we make in life are the best at the point of making. Hence I stand by every decision I made in life , but who the hell has stopped the ever conspiring mind from creating what if scenarios. So here I am drawing all the what ifs from my quiver. The list is so large that I am beginning to wonder if the lord Krishna is constantly replenishing my quiver with all the what ifs instead of the silk saris he benevolently lent to Draupadi . I guess so is the case with every individual who has time to spare and no one to share it with. Everybody has their own set of disappointments in life , some squander all their future blaming that one moment , some just pick up and move on but have left a significant something of themselves in that moment, some move as if nothing has happened. I have never been sure which way did I take.
I took upon the task to sit down and make a list of ten largest dumb ass decisions of my life (Excluding my birth on this planet as technically and rightfully it is my parents mistake, again as I said earlier a perfectly genuine decision having gone wrong in future). Like all real life situations it has thrown up the various variables , how do I rank the decisions. Following the escapist route I decided to write down the decisions now and can rank them later. This has lead to situation where in actually I can list down more than ten decisions on piece of paper and eliminate the good ones which were not dumb enough to make it to top ten. Now the problem with that is , with an impressive armory of bad decision making like that of mine , what is the cut off point. Well like the consultants in our office (whom we paid 6% of our company revenue to teach us to save 2% of the cost, which is in effect 80% of our revenue in effect we contributed 4.4% of our companies revenue to the consultants family welfare fund) taught us to go for the low hanging fruits. I am going from the order of dumbest.
The go no go process allows all the process owners to clear a set of activity with their preparedness for a activity. In my case go no go would go like this .
My abilities to write a book
Availability of time
Availability of resource i.e. a computer
So the only reason why anybody will be troubled to read any further is that I have computer and decent typing skills and the reader has really hit the pit of his or her life.
Now moving on to set the tone of things to come read this opening paragraph.
With toxic waste flowing through our veins it is so difficult to stay pure. The age when purity in thought and deed were integral part of being seem so long away. We all grow out to become what we wanted to or, most of the times what destiny sets out for us. But all along we keep facing so many paradox, one of them being, should we accept the realities of being grown up or keep remembering those innocent days and hope things would be just as simple as they were. Unfortunately life does not allow us to keep both the choices and we keep hoping for simplicity and we keeping making grown up choices one after another.
I have always been faced with such paradox and people say kept making smart choices. Unfortunately the world judges you on what they perceive to be right or wrong and not always do they match with your judgment of the situation. What the world does not see is the loss that was not stated and not so obvious losses, unfortunately again all my life the perception of my life has always been different from that of the outside world. The world kept counting what I won and I kept counting what I lost. The paradox here , every choice I made was for achieving exactly the world counted as the right choice, then why is that I am saddled with such self pity. I guess I wanted the proverbial “ I want it all” , dear o dear destiny has cruel ways teaching vain men.